Sarah and Sheila Day 25

Sarah Day 25--

Well . . . This is it. The last and final post of this blog. There were days that it seemed like day 25 was never going to come, and there were days that it seemed like it was coming a little too quick. This blog has been both a challenging and rewarding experience. It has forced my mother and I to put ourselves out there and make ourselves vulnerable. I am so proud of us . . . We were able to admit and recognize the fact that we were unhappy, and we did something about it. This is something that not many people are able to do.

In the last 25 days, I have written about many things that somehow made a difference in my life, and in another person's life too. I have written about my friends and family whom I adore. I have written about my wonderful boyfriend who has been my rock this year. I have written about my neighbor, children, and many strangers. I have written about loss and love. I have written about having hope and faith, courage to move on, and strength to succeed. I have written about tragedy, and I have written about joy. The funny thing is, I could still write about so much more, and reaching the end of this blog is bittersweet.

I can not say enough how difficult this year has been. When I look back on it, there were really only a few good things that happened in my life. Some of the main ones: My cousin and I got to live together for 6 months, and we become even closer friends. My brother got engaged, as well as one of my best friends. I got my first hamster, Roma. I photographed my first wedding, and I made the decision to go back to school. Now those are all pretty significant events and I am so blessed for each and every one of them . . . They have impacted my life in a huge way. However, compared to the amount of loss and heartache that my family has went through, both individually and as a family . . . There is no doubt that this year kind of sucked. 2012 can not get in my rear-view mirror soon enough!

I must say that this blog has done nothing but good things for me. I have learned to live each second thinking about how I can help others out, and when I can do for someone else. I have learned to always say thank you, and show my appreciation towards people when I have appreciated them. I have done things for people that I do not know, in hopes that I may brighten their day. I have learned so much in doing this, that I don't feel like I can even explain it. It has brought my mom and I closer together which is exactly what we wanted. We wanted to reconnect. And even though this Christmas was still hard . . . I know it was a little brighter because of this.

There are so many things and so many people that I am thankful for, and doing this blog just made me recognize that. I am thankful for my family. Whether we are all together or not, we are still a family and we will always be just that. I am just as thankful for Jesse, who is basically family already. I could not have picked a better boyfriend . . . I am a lucky girl! I am more thankful for friends than I have ever been before. I don't know how I ever thought that I did not need them. They have really made the last few months of this year a better one. I have thankful for my pets, and all the other animals. They are the ones who made my decision of going back to school for Zoology official. I absolutely can not see myself doing anything else other than working with animals. I am thankful for a good job to keep my mind off of life when it gets a little too hard. I am thankful for a warm bed to sleep in at night, and beautiful weather outside to wake up to in the morning.

More than anything, I am thankful that I will soon be celebrating a new year. I am looking SO forward to what 2013 has to bring. Lots of love, and weddings! New traditions . . . Out with the old and in with the new. Hopefully there will be many new "firsts" to look forward to, and maybe some lasts too. I could not be looking more forward to a new start and a fresh beginning. Time to close the book on 2012.

Thank you to all of you who decided to read this blog, and all of the wonderful things you have said about it. It has been an absolute joy for my mother and I, and I hope that we have brought a little more joy into your holiday season as well. I hope that your new year is filled with nothing but peace, love and happiness . . . Almost as much as I hope that is what mine is filled with. Ha. =)

Here's to Fresh Beginnings and Do-Overs!
Sarah

 

2012 cannot be in the rear view mirror quick enough in my opinion.  There has been so much loss, pain, and suffering that it is almost impossible to articulate just how much aftermath has been left in my life and my babies.  Personally, it feels as though I am cleaning up after a personal hurricane has blown through, and I find myself thinking, now what?  However, the past 25 days have really been a light in a dismal time.

When Sarah and I began this blog, it was as a way to help us discover the Christmas Spirit while reconnecting as mother and daughter.  We both were feeling the same things, and as a writer, I know that sometimes it can be therapeutic to put our thoughts and feelings down.  I think the greatest gift of this blog has been that we have rekindled a light in our own mommoms and baby girl relationship.  Sarah is my friend and that is an incredibly great gift ! 

Most of you have probably felt the emotion as we laughed, cried, struggled, and reflected on the "good deeds" that we opted to do throughout the course of each day.  I want those of you who are reading to know that "this" was not done in an attempt to make ourselves out to be something amazingly great, but rather as a way to really push us to grow ourselves in spite of seemingly impossible growing conditions.  And I speak for myself when I say GROW I DID and the light of Christ was the catalyst allowing that growth.  Yes, I gave of my time, talents, and treasures; however, the life changing gifts that I received through giving this month were priceless!

This month has brought light into both Sarah's and my life.  I hope that perhaps it may have brought a little light into some others as well.  And tonight my "good deed" is to leave you all with a song in your heart and a light in your life.  I heard that this beautiful song was sung last night at Nazareth in Holt, which is one of my churches I left this fall.  I missed them terribly last night as I worshipped in RLF with my grandma and my mother.  However, someone told me that I needed to listen to this song which is very beautiful.  Please read the lyrics and take them to heart:)

Go Light Your World by Chris Rice

 

There is a candle in every soul

Some brightly burning, some dark and cold

And there is a spirit who brings a fire

Ignites a candle and makes his home

Carry your candle, and run to the darkness

Seek out the helpless, confused and torn

And hold out your candle for all to see it

Take your candle, and go light your world

Take your candle, and go light your world

Frustrated brother, see how he's tried to

Light his own candle some other way

See now your sister, she's been robbed and lied to

Still holds a candle without a flame

So carry your candle, and run to the darkness

Seek out the lonely, the tired and worn

And hold out your candle for all to see it

Take your candle, and go light your world

Take your candle, and go light your world

'Cause we are a family whose hearts are blazing

So let's raise our candles and light up the sky

Praying to our Father, in the name of Jesus

Make us a beacon in darkest times

Carry your candle, and run to the darkness

Seek out the helpless, deceived and poor

Hold out your candle for all to see it

Take your candle, and go light your world

Take your candle, and go light your world

May we all take our candles and light our worlds . . . not just at Christmas, but each and every day of our lives.

God's Blessings in 2013,
Sheila

Sarah and Sheila Day 24--

Sarah Day 24--

Christmas is always a busy time of the year for me . . . Well, ever since Jesse and I started dating anyway. Trying to make it to all of the Christmas events for his family and mine seems impossible, and it usually is. Both he and I, or both of us, normally end up missing at least one every year. For the last five years, we have had seven places to be at between December 23rd-25th. That is a lot. This year was no different, only we have had to try and squeeze in one more, since mom and dad are not together.

When Jesse and I have so many places to be around Christmas time, we find it extremely difficult to sit back and enjoy the little amount of time we have to spend at one place. We are always on a time clock, and worried about making it to the next place. Usually, just as we start enjoying ourselves, it is time to leave. I have noticed that he and I are not the only ones who are frustrated by this, as sometimes our family seems to be too. They always understand, but it isn't fun to have to try and plan so much. Christmas is supposed to be relaxed and laid-back, but for he and I, it usually is not.

Sam and Jordan seem to have this issue as well. Christmas eve has always been the day Jordan and I spend here at home with my mom and dad. However, with mom and dad separating, Jordan, Sam, Jesse and I, stayed with my mom yesterday evening until this morning. At around 11:00 this morning, we all came over here for dad's turn. Jordan and Sam were only able to stay for a couple of hours before they had to leave and get to Fosston for Sam's family Christmas. Uff, it is not easy trying to work around everyone's schedule.

I think we all thought today was a little challenging emotionally. Probably more so for mom, dad and I. Jordan lives in his own house in town, and he is a go-with-the-flow kind of guy. He just wants everyone to do what they need to do, and he will do what he needs to do. Lucky for him that he can deal with tough situations that way, but the three of us are really not the same. We are doing the best that we can with trying to contain our feelings, but regardless, this day seemed to bring out some tears in the three of us.

Today my good deeds revolved around Christmas here at the house with my dad. I power-cleaned the house after I got back from moms, went into town to get some lunch for the five of us, and then cooked supper for dad, Jesse and I. Mom had a prime rib all ready to be put in the oven for us, so all I really had to do was put it in and make some ah jus. We have always had prime rib for dinner on Christmas eve . . . Unfortunately, supper did not taste nor feel the same as it usually does. Things are different now.

Time heals all wounds though, right? That is what I keep telling myself. Eventually, things like this will not be so hard to deal with. We will make new traditions and not think about the old. We will enjoy ourselves at the holidays and learn to laugh again, and I mean really laugh. We will look back on only the good memories and we will be grateful for them. One day, all of this pain we have been through will make sense. Maybe not today, tomorrow, or the next . . . But one day, it will.

Sarah

Sheila Day 24--

PHEW!  Today was really, really a tough one, and yet, there are many blessings if one takes the time to just pay attention and look for them.  The kids and I stayed up til 1:00 a.m. and watched Pitch Perfect.  This movie is so funny and the music is incredible.  All of us enjoyed it; however, Rah and I petered out during the last half hour.  The kids had to go visit Cal by 11:00 so needless to say, the time simply ended much too soon.

Before they all got up, I decided to work on my good deed for the day.  I got up bright and early to do some emailing.  I have two young men that I care a lot about that are overseas for Christmas.  They will not be with their families, and I can only imagine, this will be a little hard on both of them.  Thus, my deed for the day was to write each of them a letter and let them know that I was thinking about them this Christmas.  I hope that sharing a little of my Christmas spirit makes their day just a little bit brighter.

Then I got onto Facebook and popped off a message to Jamie, Derek, and Andy who lost their mommoms just a short time ago.  I think Christmas for them will be hard as Janeen had an amazing spirit and a zest for life.  Her presence was a gift and it filled the room.  I let them know if I was thinking about and praying for them.  Again, just hoping to make their day a little brighter.

Something cool happened in the middle of my little quest . . . I got a text from someone praying for me as they knew I would probably be having a difficult time this Christmas.  I cannot tell you how much it meant to me that some were thinking about me in the midst of their celebration . . . sigh . . .:)

Next, I texted Ken, their papa.  I said much the same thing as I said to his kiddos.  He responded almost immediately and let me know he was home for Christmas.  I am so happy that they will be spending the evening together and am praying they find the Christmas Spirit in the memories they will be sharing.

I sent several other messages throughout the day, and I was blessed with several texts from people who were also praying for me.  Today did not cost me a dime, but thinking of folks doesn't.  The only thing it costs you is a little bit of time as you jot down a message and send it off.  And from my own experience, I know that the thought means a TON!  There have been many days when those little texts have shifted the entire momentum of my day.  Those messages are saved and give me strength on days when I feel like it takes every ounce of strength to just get through.

I can only imagine that today might have been tough for a number of people.  Christmas sometimes reminds us of what is missing instead of reminding us of what is right here if we simply look for the messages from God given to us through people who genuinely care.

Prayers for Finding the Messages,
Sheila 





 

Sarah and Sheila Day 23--

Ummmmmmmmmm . . . tonight Rah and I are writing together because our post is about being with family.  This is a difficult year because it is the first that we are not all going to be together.  We have had to alternate our plans to accomodate the life changes that have happened throughout this year.  It is incredibly painful.  Tonight the kiddos and their significant others are with me and tomorrow they are with their papa.  Life . . . sigh . . .

With that being said, our good deed for today is to simply love one another and to give the gift of time to each other, why, because WE really do need it.  We need to be together.  We need to laugh.  We need to open gifts and make memories.  We need to eat Chinese food for Christmas at 10:00 just because we can.  And when we are done posting, we are going to get into our jammies, snuggle in, and watch the movie "Pitch Perfect" because a lot of life is not on key, nor is it pitch perfect.  Unfortunately a lot of it is pretty out of tune and as Simon Cowell would say "pitchy."  Thus we need to do the best we can to make music out of the notes and appreciate the melody that we have been blessed with.

Sarah and I have spent the last twenty-three days doing for others, and tonight, we are just going to love one another.  Remember, "these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love"--1 Corinthian 13:13

Prayers for Loads and Loads of LOVE!!!!!!
Sheila and Sarah

 

Sarah and Sheila Day 22--

See . . . Lots of coffee!

Sarah Day 22--

Oh my goodness, there are only 3 days left! I can hardly believe how fast time has went!

My dad recently bought us a new coffee pot to have here at the house. It uses the same type of coffee pods that a Keurig uses, but the machine itself is MUCH cooler! Unfortunately, the coffee is ridiculously expensive here in town, so we decided to make a trip to Grand Forks.

Well . . . We got a little carried away, and we ended up picking out A LOT of coffee. I mean, a lot! We went to 4 different stores solely looking for coffee, and we found different flavors at each place. It's a good thing we had tons of coupons, and now enough coffee to last us a year.
 

Besides coffee, I had a few other things to get before the holidays, and dad had some other things to look at. We browsed around town for a while and made a few purchases. It was a pretty successful shopping trip.

By about 2:00 p.m. we were starving, and I still had a good deed to do. We decided to eat a Buffalo Wild Wings, which is one of our favorites. We made the mistake that he and I always seem to make, and we ordered much too much food. It sure was delicious though! As we were chit-chatting back and fourth, dad started to talk about how much money he had spent today. As soon as he said that, I decided to snatch up the bill and pay for our meal. Dad never lets me pay for our meals, and don't think he let me get away with it easily this time! However, that was not my good deed. Our bill came out to around $35.00, and I decided to tip our waiter $15.00.

He was a fairly average waiter. Nothing too special, but he wasn't terrible by any means. I couldn't help but notice he had a wedding ring on, and I found myself thinking about if he has kids, and how costly the holidays can get. I know that $15.00 isn't a lot, but coming from a girl who was a struggling college student and waitressing to make ends meet . . . I know that extra tip that you are not expecting really makes a person feel good.

I am a true believer that a person has no idea what it's like to be a server at a restaurant, until you have done it. We really do rely on those tips to pay the bills. There is nothing worse then putting your every last ounce of enthusiasm into a table, and many times only receiving a $2.00 or $3.00 tip. If you have a good server helping you out, tip them well! If you think they are really great, leave them a note. If you had a bad experience, lets say your food wasn't cooked right . . . Remember, that is not your servers fault. We servers, always do our best to make sure you have an enjoyable meal. If you do not tip your server because of something like that, we usually take it very personally, and that can really ruin a person's night.

Tonight, I would like to say thank you to all of the servers out there trying to make ends meet. I know that it may not be the most glamorous job, but it can sure be a great one!

Sarah

My favorite serving job! Lonestar Steakhouse and Saloon.

 



I love the lights of Christmas!  The brilliant different colors, the creative displays that folks think of, and the contrast against the dark skies make them stunningly beautiful.  I think it is fun to drive around and see what people have decided to put up for the holiday season.  I LOVE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS!  I continually begged to have lights hung on the house for Christmas; however, Cal always said that they would wreck the shingles on the house, so it was never really an option.  BUT I remember the one year that changed. 

Icicle lights were just becoming popular and I absolutely loved them.  I thought it was cool the way they just trickled down from the top of the roof like frozen icicles do.  I love icicles and when the rooftops are lined with them, if I can reach, I like to take my hand and sweep them off the roof line.  It makes the coolest sound and I feel like a little kid again.  The icicles hanging from the roof are simply stunning as the light shines through them and they sparkle and shine .  I remember the day Cal came home with the boxes of icicle lights, he put them up, and I thoroughly enjoyed them for the entire holiday season . . . ahhhhhhhh . . . they were so beautiful . . . sigh

The lights were never put up again, but I remember so fondly that one solitary year where the lights adorned our home.  I think it is the search for light which has really driven Sarah and I throughout the holiday season on the quest to spread some Christmas Spirit.  I feel like through the spirit of giving, we bring the lights we long for into our own lives, kind of like the Christmas lights that were on my house that year.  I wanted them that year, I had longed for them for a long time, and finally the lights were there sparkling and bright.  I have to tell you, against the darkened skies of my life, I have found the lights in the people who I have briefly touched.  However, make no mistake, it was THEM who brought the little twinkling icicle lights into my life . . . my home is alive with the brightest of lights.

Today my act of kindness was simple.  I had stopped at the gas station to fill up with gas.  I had to look around for a couple of little things, so instead of paying at the pump like I usually do, I opted to head on in.  While I was in there I decided that I would buy a gift card, not for anyone, but for someone who was inside.  I purchased my items, my gift card, and I looked around.  I spotted two young men around the same age as my kiddos are and decided they were it.  They were chatting like brothers or good friends while they were scoping out the coffee and some snacks.  I thought about how my kids would feel if they got the the counter and someone had left them money to pay for their stuff.  It made me smile.

 

I told the lady at the counter that I wanted her to give the gift card to the two young men at the back of the store.  WHAT she said?  I repeated myself . . . um, I would like you to give this gift card to those two gentlemen and tell them Merry Christmas!  Are you serious she questioned . . . well, yes, I actually am I responded.  Oh . . . do you know them she asked.  Nope!  Oh . . . she looked confused.  The two young men were heading to the counter with their goods in tow and I needed to make my escape.  Just please tell them Merry Christmas!  I told the woman to have a Merry Christmas too and thanked her for fulfilling my request.  I don't know what happened next, and really, it doesn't matter.  Just doing it turned on the light of the spirit for me.

 

Throughout the last 22 days, as I am sure you can tell, some days were easy and some were painfully difficult.  It is funny that giving extra time, energy, and things to others can awaken feelings that we have perhaps struggled to keep down.  There were days that were filled with tears and others that were full of laughter and joy.  However, never ever were the lights off . . . not once. 

 

So my prayer tonight is this.  No matter how dark and dismal your earthly home may seem, I pray that you can find the lights of Christmas in the people that Christ works through and in.

 

Lights and Love,

Sheila

 

 

 

 



Sarah and Sheila Day 21--

Sarah Day 21--

Why is it good to have friends?

1. Friends never judge you

2. Friends never leave you alone

3. Friends always listen to you

4. Friends always encourage you

5. Friends are trustworthy

When I googled why it is important to have friends, the five answers that I listed above were the most common. In my opinion, I would say those answers are completely accurate. People would be so lonely if it weren't for our friends to help us make it through the day.

As we near the end of the end of this blog, I have began to think about the people who have made me the biggest difference in my life this year. The ones who are always there to listen to me and encourage me. The ones who are trustworthy and who will not judge me, and the ones who will never leave me alone.

Why don't our friends judge us? They don't judge us because they are our friends. They love and care for us. They are understanding and supportive under all circumstances. They have faith in our choices and the decisions we make. Friends are always true to us.

When we are going through something difficult, true friends will never leave us alone. They are there for us as long as we need them to be there. Any day and any time. They will do anything to make us laugh when we are crying, or smile when we are sad. Friends will never let us be lonely, alone. They are available for us, 24/7. Even when we want them to leave, they usually won't. That is what friends are supposed to do.

One of the most important things about being a friend, is being able to listen. Friends do not interrupt. They always understand our difficult situations. We can share anything and everything with our friends. Friends are always able to solve each others problems.

Friends motivate and encourage one another. Friends will always tell us to not be afraid of failing, because they know that we will not fail. They will push us to be our best and do our best.When we reach success, only our truest of friends will be happy for us. Friends will never doubt our dreams.

The most important thing about being a friend, is being trustworthy. Real friends never tell our secrets to anyone. We can share our most personal information with them. They will always have our back. True friends are the greatest source of relief.

I have three good friends who have been absolutely true and trustworthy to me this year. They have been there to listen to me vent, and sometimes cry. They have given me advice when I need it and hugs when I need them. They have picked me up, when I have been down, and helped me laugh when I've been sad. More than anything, they have been encouraging. They have encouraged me to push through many of the difficulties that I have faced this year. They have assured me that everything will be okay. They are always right!

Today, I went to town and picked out gifts for the three of them. Some of the things they got were the same, and some were different. I picked out gifts that made me think of them when I saw it. I wish I could have done more, since they have impacted my life in a huge way this year. They really do deserve so much more. I could not thank them enough!

I feel so blessed to have friends who really won't leave me alone when I need them. Friends who will listen to me at any moment in time, and would drop everything to be here for me if I need them. Friends who have never judged me and will never judge me, because they love me. Friends who have encouraged me to fight, and to dream. Friends that I feel I can tell everything to, because they are trustworthy. These girls are without a doubt, the best kind of friends that I could ever hope for, and I love them all!

Sarah

Laurn and I

Bert (my own personal social worker) and I

No picture of Skate and I . . . Sorry Skate.




Sheila Day 21--

Today is kind of a busy day, so I am writing my post earlier in the day.  I have a Christmas party tonight at the reservation and am looking forward to some time with my colleagues and friends.  Maybe I will get lucky and win a prize as I am told there are some nice ones; although, luck doesn't usually factor into my equation.  I also got a ham.  Now some of you might be thinking what is so great about a ham?  However, I really appreciated the gift and look forward to sharing it with family and friends.  The ham equals fun, fellowship, and food!  I think it is important to appreciate the little things as we often seem to forget that.

I began my day by wrapping the gifts for my reservation family that I am doing a little extra for this season.  I was waiting for my gifts to arrive in the mail and they finally came.   My friend Jodie helped me out with some clothes and books for the little ones which were already delivered to grandpa and grandma.  I got some cool toys for the kiddos and a little something for their mama.  I will deliver them to grandma today when I head to Mahnomen.  I hope that it helps to make the season just a little bit brighter:)

I am back in the cards, writing again!!!  I keep thinking of folks that I want to say thank you to and things that I want to do. Pastor Frank is someone who is my mentor and my friend.  He is an incredibly gifted individual who has captured the true spirit of giving in everything that he does.  I aspired to emulate him as a pastor as he embodies what it means to be caring, empathetic, and kind.  I am sure that he is not perfect, but his presence in my broken, shattered life has fit perfectly.  I wanted to send him a card and a little thank you gift for he and his bride Margaret.  They have been married for 50 years which is no easy feat in this day and age.  I wanted him to know how much I appreciated the gift of his presence in my life.

Then I opted to write a few others cards which I picked out yesterday on my trek into town.  I have really tried to pick cards with recipients in mind.  It seems a little more personal that way; however, I do believe that the hand written message is what probably matters the most.  Those little "word" gifts are all addressed and will be mailed when I head out of town for the evening.

My niece Mariah a.k.a Rosie is in college in the nursing program.  She is an incredibly hard worker and I am very proud of her perseverance.  She needed a little help from auntie who is very familiar with the academic realm.  My next task was to help her out a little.  I do not know what the outcome will be, but I do know that not trying means that nothing will happen.  Rosie Girl and I tried.  I am sending positive energy and support to her either way!

I do not know what the rest of my day will bring.  I do not know if there will be more opportunities to grow me and the Christmas Spirit that many are longing for, but I do know that I am open to the world filled with possibilities.

Prayers for Gift Giving Moments,
Sheila

Sarah and Sheila Day 20--

Sarah Day 20--

Dear Police Officers of Newtown, CT,

I am writing to you from a very small town in Minnesota. Thief River Falls is in the North Western part of the state, about 2 hours from the Canadian border. Population: 8,660. People: Kind. Weather: Cold.

I am a 23 year old college graduate. I have a degree in mass communications and a minor in art. In 6 short months, I will find myself roaming the halls of a new college. North Dakota State University, in North Dakota. This time around, I will be studying Zoology, as animals are truly my biggest passion in life. To be completely honest, I am terrified. These next few years will without a doubt, be the most challenging years of my life.

For all of you, I can imagine that this year will be the most challenging year of your lives. You have all had to watch, work through, and pick up the pieces of a terrible tragedy. A tragedy so devastating that it almost doesn't seem real. No human being should ever have to witness the things that Newtown has witnessed. My deepest sympathy goes out to each and every one of you.

My father is a police officer in Thief River Falls. He is great at what he does. In 2005, my dad had to work on the school shooting in Red Lake, MN. He says it was one of the hardest things he has ever had to go through.

When I heard the news and what happened at Sandy Hook, I was heartbroken. I was hurting for the children who list their lives, and I was hurting for those who didn't. I was hurting for the adults who did not make it. I was hurting for the families, the friends, and the teachers. And I was hurting for you.

I look at police officers as a huge inspiration. I am so proud of you and what all of you have done, you are indeed, hero's! I look at you with the same amazement that I look at my own daddy. Yup, I am my daddy's girl.

Hearing about the Newtown shooting brought me right back to the Red Lake shooting. I can not help but feel saddened when I realize that I do not remember much about it. I don't remember if I felt this hurt by it. I don't remember if I asked my dad how he was or if I gave him a hug. I don't remember if I told him I loved him and that I was proud of him. I don't remember if I said goodbye to him as he left for work, or hello when he returned. I am so sad that I don't remember.

Since I don't remember watching my daddy go through it, I am going to remember this time for all of you. I am going to pray that you have the strength to make it through the days to come. I am going to pray that you get endless hugs and kisses from your kiddos. I am going to pray that you always tell your husband or wife that you love them. I hope your husband or wife tells you they love you more. I hope that you are proud of what you have done, because the whole world is proud of you. Most importantly, I hope that you NEVER stop doing what you are doing. You are all so strong and so courageous and I will always admire what you do every day.

Sincerely,

Sarah Michaels

 Sheila Day 20--

Dear God,

When the sun came up today, I knew that I was going to do everything I could to do as much as I could to brighten the day for others.  I ran to pick up some boxes from Rah's car and opted to leave her a book that I had picked up for her this summer when we went to Giants Ridge just the kids, their significant others, and me.  I have held onto it for just the right time . . . today was it.  Thank you so much for giving me an amazing daughter to love . . . she is a such blessing.

I got the chance to go to coffee and breakfast with my "pastor" friends.  I was asked to bless the meal.  I prayed for each of them as they go into their holiday season which is such a busy time for pastors.  I think I did all right and I believe on some level I still have it!  We got the opportunity to catch up and just visit.Thank you so much for giving me each of them to walk with me spiritually . . . they are a blessing.

Then I went to make flatbread again.  The rolling is tough as one gets a little older and young arms and free time equals flatbread.  The conversation was great and the time spent was special.  Thank you for my able body and the time this holiday season to do things that create treasured memories . . . memories are blessings.

I was going to the Christmas concert that the kiddos wanted me to go to tonight.  We opted to go for supper before the concert as a group.  Grandma of one of the kiddos forgot the boots she was supposed to bring to complete the "perfect" outfit.  I offered to go back and get them.  Twenty-five minutes later I was back on the scene boots in tow.  I gobbled part of my supper and ran the girls over to the gym so the others could comfortably finish eating theirs.  I came back, threw the rest of mine in a box, and off to the concert we went.  Thank you for opportunities to help others . . . time is a blessing.

I went to the concert.  So many hugs from people I love and miss!!!!!  I got to see kiddos I baptized, kids I confirmed, youth group, and the elderly.  I made plans to do some visiting during the month I am off.  I even heard a little confession.  During the concert Santa, one of my youth, came up and said "Pastor Sheila . . . YOU ARE ON MY NICE LIST!"  I am EXTREMELY happy about that!  Thank you for all of those who have shown me love . . . love is a blessing.

Later in the concert, there was a tribute for the kiddos and teachers who lost their lives in Newtown, CT.  My Morgan was planning to read a poem dedicated to them called "My First Christmas in Heaven."  Morgan asked me to write the lead in for the piece and she did an incredible job, while Ethan, one of my other kids played "Amazing Grace" on the guitar . . . it was tender, beautiful, and everyone cried.  Thank you for the gift of words and the messages you write on my heart for others . . . words are a blessing.

During the concert I got a text.  Shelly, an incredible mom and someone I call my friend has a kiddo who has been drug through the medical ringer.  Taylor is a cancer survivor . . . multiple times.  Last year, this inspirational young man, had a heart attack.  This past year has been one of trials and tribulations.  As the music of the concert surrounded me, I was taking a picture on my phone when the text came in.  Normally I would not look, but for some reason I did.  Shelly gave me the results of Taylor's recent biopsy . . . not good as there is cancer in his cells . . . again.  My heart broke for all of them and she asked if I had any verses that would help.  All I could think of was "Jesus loves me . . . this I know" as the pain she was feeling was now weighing on my heart.  Thank you for the gift of compassion . . . empathy for others is a blessing.

God . . . I don't understand a lot of things, and I am guessing that I never will.  There is so much pain and suffering in this world and nobody seems to know why as there is no rhyme or reason to the who, what, where, why's, or how's.  BUT I do know that you are here walking with me on this journey called life.  I started out today just wanting to do the best I could and to be there for as many people as I possibly could.  Throughout the day there were high notes that made me smile with joy and low notes which made me sad and brought tears, but both made up the melody of the day.  Thank you for keeping my heart and mind open so the Spirit of Christmas, and God . . . could you please help some others to feel the spirit too.

Thank you God for YOU!
Sheila  

 

Sarah and Sheila Day 19--

Sheila Day 19--

PHEW . . . 19 days!!!!  Many days seem super, super simple; however, I have discovered that it is much easier to do a good deed if you let see . . .  actually leave the house!  It becomes much tougher if one opts to have a stay at home day and just catch up on "stuff" that needs to be done.  I love the spontaneity that comes with being in public as there re so many opportunities if one is just tuned into what is going on around them.  I think that is what happens a lot of the time . . . we just opt to tune out and get stuck in our own little bubble.

Today, I did do a couple of minor things earlier in the day, but they are really nothing to write home about.  Certainly nothing that seems particularly blog worthy.  So I found myself thinking about what to do when I remember that I had purchased several cards for a few of the individuals who have really been there for me in a number of ways throughout this past year.  Each card was chosen with a special recipient in mind.  I think getting a card in the mail is nice, and when there is a personal message, it is much nicer.

I wrote 6 cards tonight.  Each one is for someone very special to me.  I then wrote each a personal message thanking the for being such a blessing in my life.  The cards are all addressed, stamped, and put in the mail.  I just want to point out that I really, really stink at sending cards.  I think about it often, but somehow always fall short.  IF there is a birthday, in all likelihood, my card will NOT be on time.  Christmas cards, almost always pushed right to the edge of making it on time.  Anniversaries . . . I probably won't even remember them.  I aspire to be good at this, but unfortunately, this is not one of my gifts.  However, I love to receive a card and most of the individuals I sent cards to have remembered me more than once as I fought to survive the past year.  I really want them to know that their efforts have not gone unnoticed.  They were truly appreciated.

I would encourage all of you to take a moment and send a card.  I have sent more this month than I have in an entire year!  As you go through the holidays and are receiving cards, say a prayer for the sender. The photos that we see are of faces that are filled with joy and happiness; however, we never know what crosses they have had to bear in their lives.

Sheila

Sarah Day 19--

Today I had a bit of a long day. I worked for 12 hours, from 6:00 a.m to 6:00 p.m up on the second floor of the hospital. Sometimes being up on second can get pretty slow, especially when I have to be there for that many hours. We had a couple of new babies born, and we had a few patients go home, but other than that, the day was pretty mellow.

The things that I did today are probably not blog worthy either, but unfortunately, these small things are all that I have for tonight. I have spent most of the last 18 days putting a lot of thought into everything that I planned on doing. For the days that I did not have anything specifically planned, something always came up. However, today nothing that I did really seemed to be too significant. I feel like my issue is that I am getting picky, since I am looking for kind acts to do. I find myself thinking that what I do for the day has to stand out and be somewhat significant. I need to remember to take a step back and remind myself that the small things do count too.

I do not have a lot of money to spend with the holidays coming up. I am only 23 years old and trying to get some money put away so I can go back to college in the fall. Today, I could not find the extra dollars to donate to a special organization, or leave in the pop machine. I did not have time to take someone out to eat, or to pay for a strangers dinner. I have found myself thinking many times in the last 19 days, that too many things in this world cost money, and that kind of sucks.

Because I am running low on moolah, I spent my day trying to find extra things to help out with at work. In my position, we very rarely go in to patient rooms. There is usually a nurse or an aid around to do just about everything with the patients. However, today I went in to a few different rooms for different reasons. Once, I brought in an insurance form for a patient to fill out that they had requested. Once I dropped by a note from a family member, and once to deliver some flowers. I took the time to ask how each of their days were going and told them that I hoped they would be back home for the holidays. I also cleaned the computers at my desk and organized the drawers. I stocked all of the printers with paper, stocked our desk with supplies, and mailed some forgotten items. I wiped a little pile of mud off the floor that I thought someone may slip on, and I grabbed one patients family member a cup of coffee.

Nothing that I did was today was spectacular. I do not actually know if it made a difference to anyone, or if anyone recognized any of these acts. I do not know if I lightened someones load, or made someones day. It may be unfortunate, but it is what it is. I guess sometimes, a special reaction for a good deed, is not needed. Those are the times that I rely on faith. More times than not, my faith gives me reassurance when I am not sure. To this day, my faith has never let me down. I know it will not let me down today either.

Sarah